That’s right – Indies Unlimited is kind of a big deal. If you didn’t realize it, now we have proof. Short article, big impact. Check it out.
Okay, so I’m a little late for Shark Week. Or am I just really, really early? Back in 1999, I watched the movie “Deep Blue Sea.” Way the hell back in 1999, you wonder? Absolutely. I’ve held grudges longer than that, believe me. In any case, I just came across a little something I wrote after I watched it, and thought I would share just in case this thing is in your Netflix queue…
20 Things I Learned from the Movie “Deep Blue Sea”
- 50-foot-long sharks can navigate difficult areas while swimming in water only 3-feet-deep.
- Really smart sharks can tell the difference between titanium fencing and steel fencing just by eyeballing it.
- It’s okay to enlarge a 50-foot-long shark’s brain as long as you don’t do it genetically. That makes it bad.
- Smoking is very bad for you. Not only could you lose a lung, but also possibly the hand and arm that’s holding the cigarette.
- It’s okay to play with your food.
- If you are bitten in half by a 50-foot-long shark, you’ll be in tact and okay as long as you stab it in the eye with a cross while praying loudly.
- If you’re trying to defend yourself against a 50-foot-long shark, a frying pan is the weapon of choice. Toss that axe away!
- A floating compound/building can be completely demolished and still have full power.
- Really smart 50-foot-long sharks can locate a Zip disk, munch it without destroying the Ziploc bag it’s in, and not swallow it, then leave it so it can be conveniently and symbolically found.
- Even in life-threatening situations, manly men only get mad at women once they realize they’ve been used.
- If a rescue helicopter doesn’t return from a mission, no back-up will ever be sent.
- When a 50-foot-long shark is coming at you, don’t try to climb out of the water. It’ll be okay, really. Especially if you’ve got a cross. And you pray.
- Smart sharks can instantly heal the eye which was just stabbed with a cross.
- When you’re trapped in a collapsing building, you miraculously no longer need to wear your glasses in order to see better.
- Even if you’re really rich, you can still get killed if you’re stupid.
- A Leavenworth ex-convict and a structural engineer have sufficient strength to close a door against TONS of water pressure. Repeatedly.
- A floating compound’s escape routes should always be as convoluted and inconvenient as possible.
- Electrocuting a shark is far better accomplished in your underwear.
- Multimillionaire top executives of pharmaceutical companies resist the trend to carry a satellite cellular phone.
- Really smart sharks know where and how to turn the gas back on for your building.
MORAL OF THIS STORY: Stay away from really smart 50-foot-long sharks. And Samuel L. Jackson really is in every movie.
Okay, I will warn you. There is a photograph in here that could make you throw up in your mouth a little. Honestly, you could retitle this post “When Animals Crap.” But let’s not spoil the surprise so early!
My two favorite subjects to photograph are birds and whales. They are wondrous creatures, moving with magic and grace through their environments. Sometimes you’ll even manage to find them together. Bonus!
But this isn’t about whales. It’s about birds: those magical creatures of flight.
They’re sweet, and pretty, and amazing to watch.
There is just something about hawks and eagles that causes an adrenalin rush. Whether it’s their power, their ability to soar, or the fact that they are predators – I don’t know. Maybe it’s all those and more. Unfortunately, they have a habit of sitting high up on telephone poles – not exactly an ideal image for a “wild” animal.
And this morning, it seemed as if there was a hawk atop each pole – as many as six in a row. They’d take flight as I’d approach, comically heading up to the next pole on my path, as if that would accomplish anything. This one, however, was content in just staring at me.
I’ve gotten plenty of photos of hawks in flight, in fields, in trees, etc. To me, those are all blase at this point. Now I enjoy photographing them in a display of power or grace. That means getting them as they land, fish, hunt, or take off from a perch, which has become an even bigger challenge with my now outdated and somewhat non-responsive camera equipment.
So when I came across this fellow (or girl), I thought I had a pretty good opportunity to get a take off that would actually be in focus.
But then I saw him prepare for take off and I thought “Oh yeah, I’m gonna get this one!” And I got it all right!It really doesn’t get too much grosser than that, does it? You realize I’m traumatized now, right? I would have been fine with it (animals always tend to poop when my big lens is pointed at them), except for that nasty chunky stuff. That just really crosses the line. I guess I now know what the hawk thought of my presence there. Well just too frikkin bad.
All photos are copyright K. S. Brooks and may not be used without written permission. Any sharing of photos should reference K. S. Brooks, Photographer.
Mr. Pish Goes to the Farm is featured today on Kindle Books & Tips!
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WE ARE WELCOMED INTO LORD RUSS’ COURT! A REGAL, ROYAL, RENAGADE REALITY THAT WE HOPE WILL BRIGHTEN OUR LIVES AFTER MAJOR DISILLUSIONMENT…July 24, 2013
Super cool, long, and intense review of “Heir of Mystery” by Lord Russ.